NSFW Secret Lair Art Shocks MTG Players

Since launching in 1993, Wizards of the Coast have made several MTG cards. To date, over 25,000 unique cards have been made. However, there are even more MTG cards with unique art. Thanks to reprints in supplemental sets and Secret Lair drops, over 33,000 unique artworks have been created for MTG. Out of this staggering stack of cards, basic lands are responsible for 1,454 commissioned pieces of artwork. Outside of basic lands, the MTG cards with the most unique artwork are Brainstorm Brainstorm Draw three cards, then put two cards from your hand on top of your library in any order. and Lightning Bolt Lightning Bolt Lightning Bolt deals 3 damage to any target. , with 13 printings each. 

While it’s safe to say that MTG has a lot of artwork, not all of the artwork is worth remembering. Some MTG cards, for instance, have been deemed to have “culturally offensive art” and have subsequently been stricken from Gatherer. Typically, these controversial pieces of artwork are some of the oldest in MTG. Bucking this trend, however, it appears that a newly created artwork might also be deserving of this shameful title. 

Stonecoil Serpent

Released as part of the Ssssssnakessssss Secret Lair during the Winter Superdrop 2023, Stonecoil Serpent Stonecoil Serpent Reach, trample, protection from multicolored
This creature enters with X +1/+1 counters on it. didn’t raise any eyebrows at first. Upon initially being spoiled on Twitter, MTG players were merely disappointed with the drop’s dismal value. Including cards only worth $18.10, this Secret Lair is far from a compelling investment for financially minded MTG players. Following Winter Superdrop 2023 going live, however, Stonecoil Serpent would suddenly cause quite a stir. Launching for preorder alongside high-quality versions of the art to admire, MTG players quickly noticed Stonecoil Serpent was surprisingly NSFW.

Slap bang in the middle of the frame, Stonecoil Serpent’s art depicts a man impaled upon a rather gnarly spike. This man is entirely naked, with his genitals on display. From a distance, it’s possible to dismiss this unexpected detail, however, upon zooming in, there is no doubting the character’s nudity. Surprisingly, after spotting this astonishing additional snake, MTG players weren’t outraged. Instead, some players, such as u/mnkyby123, commented, “honest to god it kinda rules though.” Elsewhere, most players took to poking fun at the card and the character’s noticeable nob. 

“Which is worse, seeing a human penis or someone being anally impaled all the way up through their head?”

u/sjsmac

“I assure you dear customer the man with a pike up his ass is absolutely necessary for this secret lair”

u/Spackotacos

“Ok… Dozens of cards depicting people being dismembered, flayed, desiccated, gutted, or otherwise tortured or murdered: silence.
A three-pixel depiction of a piece of normal human anatomy that 50% of the population has: moral panic.”

u/MomQuest

Currently, it is unclear whether or not the additional anaconda in Stonecoil Serpent’s art was intentional. Subsequently, there’s no word on whether or not this art will be ‘fixed’ before the Secret Lair is printed. Some players, such as u/FeelNFine, suggested that Wizards intentionally allowed this one-eyed trouser snake to see print. “Since it’s a secret lair and doesn’t have a chance in appearing in sealed products or big box store shelves, they don’t have to care.” Whatever the reason behind this art oddity, one thing is for certain sure; MTG players don’t want to be deprived of this artwork. 

“You guys could’ve waited until it was actually printed, now they’re gonna remove it. Damnit.”

u/LaserfaceJones

Magic’s Risque Repertoire 

While the Stonecoil Serpent Stonecoil Serpent Reach, trample, protection from multicolored
This creature enters with X +1/+1 counters on it. by artist Laynes is the latest instance of nudity on an MTG card, it’s far from the only example. Reddit user u/Takesis_1, for instance, pointed out that Nearheath Stalker Nearheath Stalker Undying (When this creature dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.) features nude hanging corpses that leave little to the imagination. The art of Ekundu Cyclops Ekundu Cyclops If a creature you control attacks, this creature also attacks if able. by Robert Bliss was also highlighted by u/mox_goblin for its phallic nature. The same was said about Gluttonous Cyclops Gluttonous Cyclops {5}{R}{R}: Monstrosity 3. (If this creature isn't monstrous, put three +1/+1 counters on it and it becomes monstrous.) thanks to the bulging vein on their neck. As well as these examples, u/Moist-Mystery joked that Armada Wurm Armada Wurm Trample
When this creature enters, create a 5/5 green Wurm creature token with trample. is another surprisingly phallic MTG card. 

Alongside showcasing the pythons peppered throughout Magic’s art, several players pointed out an apartment double standard within Magic’s art department. Reddit user u/Krusell94, for instance, commented, “boobs are a no, but a naked guy getting impaled through his butt is okay… Earthbind Earthbind Enchant creature
When this Aura enters, if enchanted creature has flying, this Aura deals 2 damage to that creature and this Aura gains "Enchanted creature loses flying." didn’t die for this.” While several players echoed this sentiment, it’s not entirely true. After all, while they may be in the minority, cards such as Essence Vortex Essence Vortex Destroy target creature unless its controller pays life equal to its toughness. A creature destroyed this way can't be regenerated. do exist. Similarly, Wizards have even made deliberately provocative art with Red-Hot Hottie Red-Hot Hottie Whenever this creature deals damage to a creature, put a third-degree-burn counter on that creature. It gains "At the beginning of each end step, sacrifice this creature unless you scream 'Aaah!' at the top of your lungs." in Unhinged. 

Earthbind Earthbind Enchant creature
When this Aura enters, if enchanted creature has flying, this Aura deals 2 damage to that creature and this Aura gains "Enchanted creature loses flying." , however, as u/Krusell94 pointed out, is an interesting case in Wizards’ risque art repertoire. Initially released in Alpha and reprinted throughout 1993 and 1994, Earthbind wouldn’t make the cut for 30th Anniversary Edition. According to Wizards, this was because the card didn’t meet their “modern standards.” Problematic cards such as  Crusade and Weakness Weakness Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets -2/-1. were also cut, however, Earthbind’s removal seemed overzealous. At the time, players pointed out it was far from the only risque Beta card, as Veteran Bodyguard Veteran Bodyguard As long as this creature is untapped, all damage that would be dealt to you by unblocked creatures is dealt to this creature instead. is equally as provocative. 

Into the Unknown

At the time of Writing, WotC has not commented on Laynes’ Stonecoil Serpent Stonecoil Serpent Reach, trample, protection from multicolored
This creature enters with X +1/+1 counters on it. . Subsequently, there’s no word on whether or not it will be changed before release. If it is changed, it seems many players will be disappointed, as most players support the artwork. In fact, following the increased attention around the card, even more, players seem willing to pick up a copy or four. Should this Stonecoil Serpent, the increased attention may well lead to a substantial increase in the card’s price. For that, however, we’ll just have to wait and see, as there’s no telling how Wizards may handle this situation. 

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